Break-ups can be really tough, especially if you didn’t
want to break-up in the first place. But if you’re
absolutely sure that he’s the only guy for you, don’t
despair. Use these helpful ideas to make him want you
back.
Accept the break-up. Handle the break-up
maturely and with grace. If he broke up with
you, respect his decision and give him some time
to see things more clearly. He will appreciate your
understanding and respect you all the more for
handling yourself with dignity.
The last thing you want to do is make a
scene. Crying or getting angry with him won’t
get you anywhere, in fact, he’ll be more likely
to run in the other direction.
By accepting the break-up calmly, you are
leveling the playing field. He was probably
expecting a different reaction from you, but
now he .will be curious as to why you’re not
more upset. This may plant the first seed of
doubt in his mind.
Cut all communication. After a break-up,
emotions run high and people don’t always
make rational decisions. For this reason, it is
advisable to cut all communication with your ex for
a while.
Don’t harass your ex with phone calls, texts or
Facebook messages. This will have the
opposite of the desired effect. Wait until he
contacts you first.
It will be tough, but try not to contact your ex
for at least 2-3 weeks. Give him time to miss
you.
Give each other time to heal. Break-ups can
be rough. Harsh words are exchanged and
feelings get hurt. You need to give both yourself
and your ex time to cool down, reflect and heal.
Only then should you consider resuming the
relationship.
Getting back together while the wounds are
still fresh will cause the same old issues to
resurface and your efforts to revive the
relationship are sure to fail.
Wait until enough time has passed that you
can think about the break-up objectively and
can speak to your ex without getting upset or
angry.
Honestly assess your relationship. Take this
time apart to honestly assess your
relationship, think about what went wrong and
what went right. Try to pinpoint the exact
problems that led to the end of the relationship
and figure out whether they can be fixed.
If you believe that the problems in your
relationship are fixable, and both you and he
are willing to put in the effort to make that
happen, then your relationship stands a
chance.
If, on the other hand, the circumstances which
led to the end of the relationship are not likely
to change, or if you or your ex are unwilling to
modify your behavior for the sake of the
relationship, then getting back together may
not be the best idea.
Use your head for this decision, not just your
heart.
Apologize, if necessary. Towards the end of
the relationship or during the break-up, you
might have said some things you didn’t mean or
that you now regret. It’s never too late to be the
bigger person and apologize.
If the break-up came about as a result of your
actions, then you should definitely make the
first move to apologize. Your ex will
appreciate the gesture and may feel warmer
and more sympathetic to you as a result.
You will never be able to move on from the
past if you don’t own up to your mistakes.
Let him contact you. Let him make the first
move. It might be hard to wait, but stay
strong. A least then when he contacts you, you
will know that he was thinking about you and that
he’s ready to take a step forward in your
relationship, whatever that might be. If you push
him too soon, he might pull in the other direction.
Once he contacts you, don’t play hard to get.
Respond in a timely fashion and be perfectly
sweet and polite.
After he has made contact, you can suggest
meeting up to talk in person. Go for
somewhere neutral where you can have a
private conversational, but can leave easily if
things take a turn for the worse. A cafe or
public park would be perfect.
Remind him why he was attracted to you in
the first place. Sometimes the bad things that
happen at the end of a relationship can
overshadow all the good that came before. Remind
this guy why he fell in love with you in the first
place.
Spark his memory by wearing the same
perfume you wore on your first date, or a
piece of clothing he thought you looked good
in.
Reminisce about some of the great times you
had together. Make him remember how he felt
about you when times were good.
Take things slowly. Don’t rush headfirst back
into the relationship. Take time to talk things
through and make sure the two of you are on the
same page. Ensure that you both know what you
need to work on and are willing to give things a
chance.
Try dating again. Go out for dinner, go
bowling or go see a movie together. Spend
short, concentrated periods of time together.
Get to know one another all over again.
If you try to pick up exactly where you left off,
then history is doomed to repeat itself.
Leave the past in the past. If the two of you
have worked through your issues and you’re
both willing to make a fresh start, be thankful for it.
Look on this as a brand new relationship, with no
baggage attached. Forget about what happened in
the past and focus on your future together.
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